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Transcript

IMPOSTER!

Dealing with Impostor Syndrome

SYMPTOMS OF IMPOSTOR SYNDROME

Superwoman/man

The Perfectionist

"I Must Not Fail"MicromanagerControl FreakDifficulty DelegatingSets Excessively High GoalsIf You Want Something Done Right, You Better Do It Yourself!

"I Feel Like A Fake""I Just Got Lucky"OverworksStay Later Work HarderDown Time is a WasteBurn the Candle at Both EndsCan't do Hobbies, Must Work"I Have to Work Harder To Prove My Worth!"

Asking for Help Makes Me Feel Like A Phony"I Don't Need Anyone's Help""I Refuse Assistance So I Can Prove My Worth"

Remind students they belong

Help them to embrace risk & share their fears

Remind yourself it is normal not to know everything.

Talk about it Open a dialogue with others

Fail Forward

Given them freedom, don't be a helicopter professor.

Sources

TREATMENT OF IMPOSTOR SYNDROME

One powerful antidote to Imposter feelings is to take the time to talk to trusted peers and mentors about their careers. Listen to their stories and experiences and you’ll likely discover that nothing came easy.

The Soloist

Natural Genius

The Expert

"I Just Don't Know Enough"Constantly Seeking Trainings & Certifications"I Must Improve to Succeed"

"I Have to Get It Right on the First Try"Used to Getting "Straight A's", Falls Apart at a Lower MarkThe Smart OneAvoids Doing Things You Aren't Good At

Students

Self

Be Kind to Yourself!

Seek Support

More Information

A Video Source

Who Am I?

Take today as your opportunity to start accepting and embracing your capabilities.

Since people who experience this phenomenon are convinced they’re phonies amongst real-deal colleagues, they often push themselves to work harder and harder to measure up. But this is just a false cover-up for their insecurities, and the work overload may harm not only their own mental health but also their relationships with others. Not sure if this applies to you?

  • Do you stay later at the office than the rest of your team, even past the point that you’ve completed that day’s necessary work?
  • Do you get stressed when you’re not working and find downtime completely wasteful?
  • Have you left your hobbies and passions fall by the wayside, sacrificed to work?
  • Do you feel like you haven’t truly earned your title (despite numerous degrees and achievements), so you feel pressed to work harder and longer than those around you to prove your worth?
Imposter workaholics are actually addicted to the validation that comes from working, not to the work itself. Start training yourself to veer away from external validation. No one should have more power to make you feel good about yourself than you—even your boss when they give your project the stamp of approval. On the flip side, learn to take constructive criticism seriously, not personally. As you become more attuned to internal validation and able to nurture your inner confidence that states you’re competent and skilled, you’ll be able to ease off the gas as you gauge how much work is reasonable. Part of the solution is to revisit your motives. Try to rediscover, if you can, the joy of creation for its own sake. Don’t see the outcome of your next project as some kind of barometer of your worth. Believe in yourself and break the Imposter spiral by putting in the work and effort that you feel this particular project deserves and requires based on its merit and difficulty level.

Experts measure their competence based on “what” and “how much” they know or can do. Believing they will never know enough, they fear being exposed as inexperienced or unknowledgeable.

  • Do you shy away from applying to job postings unless you meet every single educational requirement?
  • Are you constantly seeking out training or certifications because you think you need to improve your skills in order to succeed?
  • Even if you’ve been in your role for some time, can you relate to feeling like you still don't know enough?
  • Do you shudder when someone says you’re an expert?
It’s true that there’s always more to learn. Striving to bulk up your skillset can certainly help you make strides professionally and keep you competitive in the job market. But taken too far, the tendency to endlessly seek out more information can actually be a form of procrastination. Start practicing just-in-time learning. This means acquiring a skill when you need it–for example if your responsibilities change–rather than hoarding knowledge for (false) comfort. Realize there’s no shame in asking for help when you need it. If you don’t know how to do something, ask a co-worker. If you can’t figure out how to solve a problem, seek advice from a supportive supervisor, or even a career coach. Mentoring junior colleagues or volunteering can be a great way to discover your inner expert. When you share what you know it not only benefits others but also helps you heal your fraudulent feelings.

Perfectionism and imposter syndrome often go hand-in-hand. Think about it: Perfectionists set excessively high goals for themselves, and when they fail to reach a goal, they experience major self-doubt and worry about measuring up. Whether they realize it or not, this group can also be control freaks, feeling like if they want something done right, they have to do it themselves. Not sure if this applies to you? Ask yourself these questions:

  • Have you ever been accused of being a micromanager?
  • Do you have great difficulty delegating?
  • Even when you’re able to do so, do you feel frustrated and disappointed in the results?
  • When you miss the (insanely high) mark on something, do you accuse yourself of “not being cut out” for your job and ruminate on it for days?
  • Do you feel like your work must be 100% perfect, 100% of the time?
For this type, success is rarely satisfying because they believe they could’ve done even better. But that’s neither productive nor healthy. Owning and celebrating achievements is essential if you want to avoid burnout, find contentment, and cultivate self-confidence. Learn to take your mistakes in stride, viewing them as a natural part of the process. In addition, push yourself to act before you’re ready. Force yourself to start the project you’ve been planning for months. Truth is, there will never be the “perfect time” and your work will never be 100% flawless. The sooner you’re able to accept that, the better off you’ll be. People who exhibit unhealthy perfectionism are fearful of failure, fearful of criticism, hate making mistakes, stew over past errors, and worry excessively about disappointing others. You can counter this by trying to develop a healthy perfectionist approach, which is about striving to do as well as possible, for yourself, not for outside approval; and not worrying excessively about mistakes or set-backs.

Young says people with this competence type believe they need to be a natural “genius.” As such, they judge their competence-based ease and speed as opposed to their efforts. In other words, if they take a long time to master something, they feel shame. These types of imposters set their internal bar impossibly high, just like perfectionists. But natural genius types don’t just judge themselves based on ridiculous expectations, they also judge themselves based on getting things right on the first try. When they’re not able to do something quickly or fluently, their alarm sounds. Not sure if this applies to you?

  • Are you used to excelling without much effort?
  • Do you have a track record of getting “straight A’s” or “gold stars” in everything you do?
  • Were you told frequently as a child that you were the “smart one” in your family or peer group?
  • Do you dislike the idea of having a mentor, because you can handle things on your own?
  • When you’re faced with a setback, does your confidence tumble because not performing well provokes a feeling of shame?
  • Do you often avoid challenges because it’s so uncomfortable to try something you’re not great at?
To move past this, try seeing yourself as a work in progress. Accomplishing great things involves lifelong learning and skill-building—for everyone, even the most confident people. Rather than beating yourself up when you don’t reach your impossibly high standards, identify specific, changeable behaviors that you can improve over time. For example, if you want to have more impact at the office, it’s much more productive to focus on honing your presentation skills than swearing off speaking up in meetings as something you’re “just not good at.”

Sufferers who feel as though asking for help reveals their phoniness are what Young calls Soloists. It’s OK to be independent, but not to the extent that you refuse assistance so that you can prove your worth. Not sure if this applies to you? Ask yourself these questions: Do you firmly feel that you need to accomplish things on your own? “I don’t need anyone’s help.” Does that sound like you? Do you frame requests in terms of the requirements of the project, rather than your needs as a person?